Emerging Church Dissolves (Sort of)

Abandoned Warehouse

Our Presbytery’s emerging ministry Hot Burning Cauldron of Funk sort of dissolved over the weekend. Funk was started by Rev. Brian Merritt as an alternative to the stuffy legalism that he saw in most of the church. While reading scripture one day during an all day Lectio Divina conference he had a revelation, the Bible talks about the poor!

So, in an act of deep faith Brian began panhandling to fund his new intentional community. With the money that he raised in the Georgetown area of Washington D.C. he was able to purchase a warehouse in the inner city. “I really thought that I had something to give those people. It was the God in me.”

Soon his community had grown to almost 20 people whom he had recruited from Evangelical Bible schools at bars. Through miming and puppetry they fed the souls of many of the children in the community. They made their own cloths until the unfortunate indecency trial.

Since the group did not believe in hierarchy or power, over time there have been fissures in their utopian ideals. People became tired of Brian’s constant sanctimonious table talks about money. Things came to a head last week at their 2 1/2 semi-triennial dystopian film festival when during an alcohol induced discussion a fight broke out over whether Soylent Green was actually dystopian.

The community has decided to take a 6 month period of “discernment” to decide their future. Each was given 12 pieces of blank paper and crayons where they will meditate and draw. The drawings will be interpreted by a spiritual director and that will determine their future. Until then Brian will be holding twitteratias at the local Coffee Skank every Sunday evening.

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One Response to “Emerging Church Dissolves (Sort of)”

  1. The Rev'd Dr. Hedg E. Mony, Jr. Says:

    Surprise, surprise, surpise. What starts out in “Lectio Divina” ends in six months of pergatory. Well, maybe “dissolution” is truely plain evidence that Grace is Irresistible. Or maybe, the “Burning Hot Cauldron” was warmed by the very fires of Hell and those sodden souls were finally convicted by their uncomfortable proximity!
    Or maybe both.
    In Status,
    HEM

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